Decennial Retrospective: A Tribute To The Great One

Ten years ago today I lost my grandfather. I can't believe it's been a decade. This is the eulogy that I gave for him a few days after Christmas in 1997, on behalf of his grandchildren. He is one of the most significant influences in my life. Not a single day has gone by without my thinking of him. I don't remember much about giving the actual eulogy; I was in a trance, focused on the magnitude and sadness of giving such a difficult and important speech. Right after the funeral, my grandmother walked up, took my hand, looked into my eyes and said, "He would be so proud of you." I don't know if she knew how influential and comforting her words were to me, but I like to believe that she did.

A Tribute To The Great One

based on a story by Jacqueline Goldstein

If you were to look through the records of American history and politics, you would find so many people who were considered great. Their contributions to society vary. Some are brave and decorated war heroes. Others are fearless, determined leaders who had dreams for a better tomorrow. We take great pride in these countless men and women who contributed their hearts, minds, ideas and lives for our future.

Yet there are so many names that will never be found in these pages of history. They will never stand among the elite, the remembered or the revered... except within the hearts of those who knew and loved them. Though not universally known, they are equally deserving of all our accolades and praise; their hidden and seemingly insignificant contributions are relevant nonetheless.

Recently, one of the greatest of these people was taken from us. You won't find his name in any history book or in the headline of any newspaper. He didn't fight any heroic war battles. He didn't make any huge discoveries that will save millions of lives. He never signed a treaty that will promote world peace... he was just one man. And yet, that is what makes his life great, and makes his memory a legacy.

One man... one person... one contribution.

It is so easy to forget about the individual, this power of one. In a time when we continually look to others to make a profound difference in our own lives, we forget about the consistently forgotten. We often see greatness in terms of its community and social significance, but we fail to see that the most important roles that people portray are those of parents, children, siblings and grandparents. The person destined for greatness is never considered within the boundaries of these roles. Are these people any less great? Do they contribute any less? I think that our definitions of greatness have to be changed to include the common, everyday people who fundamentally touch our lives.

These individuals exemplify the power of one. Their lives profoundly touch the rest of us... they guide, teach, discipline, care... they love. They are what directly makes us who we are. They are a layer of ourselves, a part of the whole which we present to the world each and every day. They are a distinct part of each success and every failure. Yet they are so often forgotten, pushed behind the walls of consciousness and insignificance.

All around us we see monuments that praise people of greatness. They strive to remind us that these stone vestiges embody bravery, commitment and honor. But do they personally, individually affect you or me? Are they really a part of us?

They are a part of our history granted, but we often forget that they simply serve as symbols. While these statues are meant to prove the greatness of their likeness and their immense significance in this world, are they truly an accurate measure of greatness? The man I knew and loved has no great statue created in his honor. In a hallway around the corner, there is a simple, small marble slab among countless others which whispers that he once existed. In modest lettering it reveals his simple identity:

"Ralph S. Wolfe. June 3, 1911 - December 26, 1997."

This is his great monument.

One man... one person... one contribution.

And yet if that is all we see, we are not looking deep enough. His legacy does not lie behind some ostentatious symbol. It lies within every individual that had the honor of knowing him. He stands behind every action I take. He is my words, my thoughts, my opinions. He has instilled in me a profound sense of humanity, humility, and perception. He has given me the tools to create a legacy of my own, to make my own contribution to this world. His mark may not be of historic proportions but it is just as brilliant.

It burns just as bright as the great men and women that are immortalized in the pages of history. Yitzak Rabin was one of those great figures and yet who was it that delivered his eulogy? Who was it that told his story? Was it one of the prominent heads of state who worked closely with him to promote peace within the Middle East? No.

It was his granddaughter.

I am sure what made him great in her eyes was not the same as what made him great in ours. His legacy to her is far different than what history dictates it to be. It is much more profound.

Three days ago, the world lost a great man. His name is Ralph Wolfe and he was my grandfather. His legacy lies within the contributions that he made to this world and all that had the privilege of knowing him. We will continue to love him and remember him. His departure epitomizes a great truth: greatness is in the eye of the beholder. Knowing him has shown me just how magnificent and profound that truth really is.

I love you, Grandpa.